3 Truths That Hide Beneath Our Fears and Why We Need to Heal Within

3 Truths That Hide Beneath Our Fears and Why We Need to Heal Within

Part of this article is from a guest piece I originally wrote in November 2017. I have now added to/extended this work for The Motivation Angel.

We all feel fear. Fears are an inextricable part of our lives because we live largely from our minds rather than from our hearts. The essential role of our mind is to keep us safe, protected, and in a state of familiarity. In doing so, our fears can often keep us limited and stuck in circumstances that devour our inner being and hold us back from the beauty of potential and possibility. Our heart and soul beat for chance and all things new, whereas our mind or ego serves the fundamental nature of our very human survival instinct, “fight or flight”- to stay alive and insulate ourselves from potential harm, and we would not survive this world without this innate instinct and so it has its purpose.

To understand what makes us afraid we need to travel far and wide, deeply into our nature, social or familial conditioning and life experiences. And the key word here is “understanding”; once we strip things back we can find clarity and a heightened awareness of who we are and our triggers and motives that can draw us forward as well as hold us back.

What are you resisting?

Fears highlight to us what we are resisting, and for the most part, we resist healing our inner pain born from loss, failure and emotional trauma because it is such a dark and scary path to venture upon. It is painful and unnerving to face our inner demons and shine a torch on our darkness, and yet, unless we do, our inner wounds will continue to spiral within us and manifest as anxieties, worries and fears that lock us out of life.

We are born fearless; as children we got back up each time we fell with greater courage and resolve- we let nothing stand in our way because we were driven by our heart and emotion, innately we were aware of our innocence and vulnerabilities. As we grow into adulthood our mental processes intensify, we build invisible walls, create filters and an imaginary cage around our heart- a blanket of perceived safety that satisfies sheltered living.

Exposure

Beneath all those layers of fear are the hidden caves of our innate fragility and vulnerability- something we protectively try to disguise. We conceal our fragility so we can protect ourselves from pain and the dramatic inconvenience of change. But life is a full experience that calls to us to embrace it; the good, the bad, and all the messy bits in between. Good and bad are just perceptions that we can mindfully tweak. Life is not a straight line…it is a tapestry of messiness. Everything has a purpose and we evolve through all our difficulty when we intuitively empower ourselves to do so. Life requires us to show up and shine and to take the risk in order to reach for the potential reward. How can we do so if we don’t endeavour to strip back our fears and embrace a level of vulnerability?

Through the vessel of vulnerability and the might of our inner strength we find the courage that moves us forward toward chance and possibility; a place where we can open up to trusting ourselves, lead with our hearts, and evolve through our fears.

“Fears are a way of disguising to us and to the world just how exposed and vulnerable we truly are” – Christine Evangelou – Stardust and Star Jumps

Self-Created Limits and Emotional Boundaries

We create our own limits and boundaries. In cognizance of this, if we are able to construct walls of limits and fears then we can certainly knock them down. We deceptively guard and shield our hearts because we fear pain and the emotional turbulence that is so chaotic and overwhelming, we desire to live with ease and certainty- and yet it is the uncertainty and mystery of life that we should be reaching toward because that is where opportunity and possibility reign free. When we bravely work through our fears, emotional upheavals and internal struggles rather than keep them concealed or attempt to deny them, we begin to dull the echo of the fearful giant that consumes our thoughts and closes down our heart. Understanding our inner settings and soul essence helps us to use fear as a source of fuel.

We need to reflect upon what sits beyond the surface level of what makes us afraid, and sometimes pain, deep emotion and heartbreak are the chief catalysts we need to do the transformative inner work. Pain has a purpose. When we feel, we heal.

“We are all museums of fear”- Charles Bukowski

The Mask We Wear

Life is a masquerade. What are we trying to hide from one another and ourselves? Fears and anxiety mask our authenticity, integrity and deeper values. We live in a state of repression rather than expression. When we face our unresolved emotions, turmoil and fears then we begin to scrape away at this mask we wear to the world. Instead of playing the role we feel we should, we can fearlessly embrace ourselves and express the voice of our heart. We are all vulnerable and the greatest beauty in life is inspired by that unique fragility that opens our hearts to love, gratitude, compassion, and committing to a meaningful existence. All experiences are valuable- whether they bring us pain, failure, or sorrow.

We blaze our embers of light and fiery candour through the darkest times that transform us in a very deep and personal way. When we stop hiding we can start seeking the full experience of life and rebirth into a more authentic version of who we are. Our emotional depth is the liquid gold of our existence.

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear”- Mark Twain

Reconcile what hurts inside

We must remember that we are the managers of our thoughts and emotions- they are simply energies that will come and go. All energy is mutable so we should not trap ourselves in repetitive processes. We can choose how we feed and channel that energy and our fears, and when we do so we inspire self mastery and an autonomous approach to life.  When we heal from the grief and strife which is an inevitable part of life, we open up a gateway that blasts our fears out into a wide open space so that we can find some resolution and reconcile what hurts us so greatly inside.

Fears begin from a wounded, unexpressed heart but manifest and cycle through our mind…so if we heal our heart then our mind will surely follow. 

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Categorised as: Life Coaching and Mentoring, Personal Growth and Spirituality

Tagged with: emotional intelligence, fears, mindfulness and self reflection, self development, vulnerability